Tuesday, March 5, 2013

The "Princess Predicament"

There are 3 kinds of people in my life. Crazy people, sane people, and those who think they are sane, but are indeed, BAT-POOP BONKERS.  I'd like to address the latter. The first two are interesting, to be sure. However THEY are not who I am addressing today.

I am addressing grown women who insist on being treated like "princesses" (excuse me, while I vomit). Not the Disney kind... the "Jersey" kind. Grown women who are demanding and selfish and completely consumed with themselves.  They rant about being "disrespected" by the "stupid cashier" who wouldn't return their (obviously worn) sweater, because it didn't have tags on it and she didn't have a receipt.  They use their minions as their audience, to excite them and give them more courage to be, (if possible) more arrogantly annoying.

Don't get me wrong, as a woman, I am all about people treating me with respect.  I love it when my husband opens doors for me or offers me his coat if the weather turns cold and I didn't think to bring a jacket.  I adore that my husband insists that our kids speak kindly to me even if they're mad at me.  I light up inside when he argues in defense of my cause! I love being treated like a lady!

However, I'm curious as to how we got this whole generation of entitled, manipulating, mediocre minded women???  How is this possible?  I blame the parents. I knew how to do my own laundry be the time I was 10 years old.  Wash. Dry. Fold. Put away.  The whole 9 yards.  Then how is it, that so many of my friends didn't know how to do their own laundry when they got to college?  The answer is simple. They weren't taught.  I believe the princess predicament stems from the same problem.  These women were not taught as children that these, naturally child like qualities, were unacceptable in adults. Perhaps their parents wanted to keep their kids as little as possible for as long as possible.  Or maybe their parents wanted to purchase their children's love through something less valuable than mutual respect. After all, mutual respect is a long a difficult sentiment to instill in a child.  Many times you can't reap the rewards of your efforts until the child has grown up.  But the instantaneous results of giving in to a tantrum, or doing things for our kids that they can clearly do for themselves, will always feel better in the moment.  Children who grow up with out being taught coping mechanisms are a burden to society.  Regardless of the motivations behind producing a child who will grow up and act like a princess, I feel I know the cause... Lazy and insecure parenting.  Giving in to a child so they will love you today, but not respect you tomorrow is a slippery slope.

So right about now, you're probably wondering what the difference between "princess" and  "lady" is... Well, I'll tell you.

Qualities of a "Princess"...

  • Vain
  • Selfish
  • Throws childish tantrums when she doesn't get her way.
  • Blames others for her mistakes.
  • Insecure
  • Jealous of those who have more than she does.
  • Always wants to be the center of attention.
  • Uses lies and manipulation to get her way.
  • Won't help her friends succeed, in fear that they will surpass her.
  • Assumes everyone should cater to her every whim. 

Qualities of a "Lady"...

  • Kind 
  • Thoughtful
  • Charitable
  • Looks for ways to serve others.
  • Shows respect for other people's time, talents and resources.
  • Is grateful for all that she has.
  • Is honest, but not hurtful.
  • Is happy to help others succeed in their endeavors.
  • Has a personal motto of:  "If you make a mess, clean it up.  If you see a mess, clean it up." (and applies this line of thinking to every aspect of her life).
As the mother of a beautiful darling daughter and 2 totally awesome boys, I have a vested interest in the next generation being prepared for REAL LIFE!  I am raising my children understand that they are special and an important part of our family with something unique to offer the world.  However I am also raising them to understand that the world is a very big place and they are not the only people in it.  Respect for others is always emphasized in our home.  I hope for their sake that other people are raising their kids with the same type of confidence.  I know that my kids won't always LIKE me, but they will always LOVE me, and that is why I owe them this education while they live in my home.  I would hate for them to have to get this lesson from the world, because it's not always as kind as a mother would be.

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